We are told to have positive thoughts and to be optimistic about our life all the time. We are told to avoid negative thoughts by immediately changing them to positive happy ones, hence preventing us from having a “bad day.” We are told negative emotions are bad and should be avoided if we want to be happy and successful. We are told if we are not growing we are dying, so we should never have a day off.
Yesterday I had a bad day. I knew it was going to be a bad day from the moment I woke up. I felt tired, sleepy, no energy and didn’t want to do anything. I told myself I needed to shake this off because I needed to workout. I kept delaying it and kept napping on the couch. Nothing motivated me to get up. I would say “just a quick nap for 10 minutes,” but I kept falling back to sleep. Then anxiety joined the party and then anger when I felt like a loser for messing up my workout streak. I finally got up from sleeping on the couch most of the day at 11:45 pm and felt like I had failed myself. I didn’t even shower the whole day and felt even worse that I had wasted a whole entire day in doing nothing.
IT’S OK TO HAVE A DAY OFF
But I was doing something very important, and that was letting my body heal and rest my mind. The first thing I did when I woke up the next morning was think about the conversation going on in my subconscious while I was sleeping. It said: “It’s ok to have a bad day. It’s ok to admit it. It’s ok to move on without making a big deal about it. What matters is that I heal and recover from my bad day.” There was no need to blame myself for something that is out of my control and as normal as anything else. It’s important that we become honest with ourselves and admit we can have a bad day either physical or emotional once in a while and that we take time to heal.
OUR NEGATIVE EMOTIONS ARE NOT BAD
The truth is our negative emotions are not bad. They are just as normal as our positive emotions, we just don’t know what to do with them when they come up. We are told to avoid them like the plague and soon they won’t come back, but that is not true. Suppressed negative emotions come back and more times than we care to admit. We suffer in silence and think something is wrong with us simply because we refused to accept that our negative emotions are a big part of our life.
WE COME BACK STRONGER
We focus too much attention on positive feelings but we don’t talk about our negative feelings. They are both part of our human nature for a reason and we should not ignore them. Having emotional intelligence means being aware of the power and control our emotions have in our lives. We must learn to make friends with our negative emotions and discover their strengths. This is how our subconscious mind talks to us and tells us something is wrong, and we need this time off. We must learn to be kind to our selves and show gratefulness someone is watching over us. I woke up this morning thanking my subconscious mind for forcing me to rest and apologized for not being understanding. I learned a valuable lesson that I intend to always remember when this type of day comes back again, and believe me it will. We live hectic lives that sometimes all we need is a good cry or a day in bed doing absolutely nothing to come back stronger. It’s ok to have a “bad day” but more importantly, sometimes they are absolutely necessary.