They say we all have haters. Those internet trolls that are so far away we usually don’t care what they think of us. They are total strangers who don’t matter in our lives so we don’t give them much thought. We have all gotten used to them as one of the many annoying parts of life. The bottom line is whoever these haters are, they remain relatively imaginary or invisible on the web, far away from any actual harm other than small annoyances every once in a while.
We should use their fuel to burn our fire.
But what if they are not such a stranger? What if this hater is someone close and not so invisible? A spouse or a parent or a sibling or a friend or a cousin? You know, that person who we dread and secretly hold back just in case they read our posts? We secretly place them in blocked lists so they don’t read our stuff. That’s how far we have to go just to be ourselves! It’s exhausting. This is how you know who this person is. If you have to go far and wide to hide what you think just to actually be yourself, then you have one of these family trolls. The worst kind there is! Did you know you can actually defeat this person? Yes, by pushing on no matter what they think.
There’s always gonna be someone who doesn’t like you.
By being your true self you can defeat this person because it’s not an actual person you hide from, it’s the fear of the shame you would feel if they saw who you really are. The shame you feel of being your TRUE SELF! The fear of being judged by this person sometimes paralyzes. There’s nothing worse than thinking someone we care about is secretly laughing or criticizing what we say and do. I have lived with this fear for years and I am just learning how to put it behind me once and for all.
Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage and confidence in the doing.Theodore Roosevelt
I used to have so much of this fear throughout my young life and it wasn’t easy to overcome it. I don’t even think it can be defeated. This fear comes from our childhood so it is well deep and buried in our subconscious. It’s all the crap we were told as children we should and should not do. Reaching it is hard but not impossible. Do you know who also lives in your subconscious? Your True Authentic Self (TAS) and is just as powerful if not more.
Now that I am a full-grown woman and I have learned to think for myself and to not give a damn what ANYONE else thinks of me. I have found that confidence defeats fear and the more confidence I get, the smaller my fears become. So how do you defeat this fear? By continuing to do what you love to do and getting better at it. The more you do, the more confident you will become because confidence is the fuel your TAS needs to thrive and to break through all the barriers. With time your confidence will be so big that will defeat any fear you have of anything. You will ultimately become fearless and you know every woman’s life goal dream is to be Fierce!
Focus on doing what you love and continue to get better.
So to stop worrying about what others think, imaginary or real ones you have to work on your confidence. Don’t let other’s hate and negativity get in your head because this fear and doubt will only hold you back. We all have so much more to give and we owe it to ourselves to find all which makes us happy. Make a list of everything you love doing and focus your time and energy on building upon those skills. Don’t let their doubt or hate cloud your mind or distract you from your life goals.
Every woman’s life goal is to be Fierce!
Focus on your confidence, focus on YOU, nurture your badass self (TAS) and the positive state of mind of the person you know you really are: funny and creative and fearless. This amazing person is already in us. We just need to let her take control. For years I have pushed her down or pushed her away, but the wisest thing I’ve ever done in my life is to embrace her fully and let HER take over. She is fearless and believes I can have a life without limitations or permissions and doesn’t give a damn what them haters think. This is where my happiness is and she knows. She appreciates me, respects me, and is always proud of all the hard work I do.
“There is nothing more beautiful than a confident woman”